Strange Times at Kutna Hora

Before I came to Prague, I had lunch with my Rabbi in Erie.  He told me about a few things in Prague I should see, and we talked a lot about Europe generally.  But, one thing I remember him telling me that I should see, that he saw when he was here, is the city of Kutna Hora.  He described it as bizarre, and after our program's day trip there today, I think he was pretty much dead on.

Kutna Hora is a small town about an hour outside of Prague.  It was important centuries ago after silver ore was discovered beneath the city.  We left Prague about 8 am, although we were all a few minutes late as we struggled to wake up after going to a foam party the night before.  But that's a story for another time.  Only a small portion of my program actual made this trip, but my whole apartment went, because, well, why not?

We arrived in the city about 9:30 and started our 3 hourish tour.  To be honest, hardly anyone was paying attention because it was early and we just wanted to look around.  But, the first place we visited was very strange and worth talking about.  It was called the Church of St. James or St. Barbara officially (I think), but it is really known as "the bone church."

The bone church; a pyramid in the bone church.

This church employs bones from some 40,000 people who died during the Plague-ish era to make pyramids, chandeliers, sculptures, and general decorative pieces throughout the small church.  The pyramids were the first things built, in the 15th century I believe, by a blind man who was basically bored and looking for ways to use the people in the graves to make room for more dead people.  Seriously.  During the Hapsburg monarchy in the 19th century, the bones were expanded to form many other decorative structures to complete the church.

Skulls with injuries from medieval injuries; me next to a bone sculpture; the crest of the famous Schwarzenberg family made up of bones.

Why would someone think this is a good idea?  Apparently it is spiritual to be surrounded by reminders of death, so that we live our lives well, etc. etc.  It was just kind of creepy.  And we all thought we were going to be haunted.

For most of the rest of the tour through the rival cathedral, the royal palace, and parts of the town, and more, I hung near the back and talked to our program directors for a while, because that was frankly a bit more interesting.  Lunch was good, at a typical Czech style place.  I couldn't resist getting one last pork knee before heading back to the U.S.  Can't really get this at home (probably a good thing too).

Dad would be proud.

After lunch, we went to get a tour of the silver mine.  We were warned that there were some extremely tight spaces, so if you were claustrophobic not to go.  Luckily, I am not, but a bunch of people I was with opted not to go.  Turns out if was probably a good decision, as the mine did get cramped in many places.

The whole tour was one of the most ridiculous situations I've experienced in Europe so far.  Why?  The tour guide, mostly.  He was an old Czech man who had probably lived in Kutna Hora his whole life.  He was dressed in slacks, a couple layers and a sweater, a hard hat, a white lab coat, and Crocs for shoes.  Yes, Crocs.  He had one eye that was cross-eyed and one more normal eye.  Surprisingly, he actually spoke English.  We were all taking pictures of him and he actually got mad at that.

Our tour guide and his attire.

To go in the mine, we were all required to wear hard hats and white coats (to protect against mud and slime) and carry flashlights.  This was not like the touristy salt mines we had visited in Poland, this was hardcore.  We put on our coats and were paraded through a couple streets (so that other people could laugh at us) and then headed down some 179 steps or something to the mine.

Through the mines.

It was tight quarters.  We had to tuck and twist and be generally squeezed together a lot.  Our guide told us a few interesting stories about past tourists, and they went something like this:

"I had a Denmark family.  The man he was quite fat.  He had trouble getting through part of cave.  His kids came behind him and they push.  Eventually, he break free and I say he was liberated."

"There was a Swedish woman, and she was quite beautiful.  When going through skinny part of cave, she had a tight fit, and on other side, she tell me, 'I lost my breast.'  Let us move on now."

"An American family came, and the man was heavy, about 140 kg [which is approaching 300 lbs].  He get to small part of cave, and has to swim through the opening to keep going."

No joke, actual quotes.  One of our program directors was laughing so hard at the whole situation before we even got in the mines that she had to step out and compose herself.  It was hilarious.  And he was wearing Crocs!

Me and Henrieta, one of our program directors.

The rest of the day was uneventful.  I am currently waiting nervously for Game 3 of the Cavs-Celtics to start.  One thing I will look forward to upon returning is the ability to watch sports on regular tv, i.e. not on bootleg websites.

Can you believe I come home in two weeks?  I sure can't.

Here's just a weird picture I came across in Prague this week: